I so want to whine and cry on your shoulder right now. I’m sitting hear bundled up in the husbands sweats with a blanket on my shoulders and one of the kid’s winter hats on. I’ve been battling a cough for quite a few days and then last night… BAM… it hit me like a ton of bricks. Fever, chills, congestion, muscle aches, the works.

The husband took me to the doctors this morning and it seems I have bronchitis. Lovely. Just what I needed on my long weekend off with my parents in town.

ugh.

But even though I could be totally miserable right now I’m TRYING to stay positive. Earlier I camped out on the living room floor and played shoots and ladders with the family, I enjoyed the homemade turkey and orzo soup mom made from the Thanksgiving leftovers and now we are up watching cheesy horror movies with a warm cup of tea.

When people asked, I used to tell them how sick I was. The more I talked about being sick, the worse I got. Finally, I started saying, "I’m getting better." It took a while, but then I started to feel better, too.

I found that quote in The Book of Positive Quotations and I hope a positive attitude helps me make the best of my sick days. I plan on taking it easy, getting lots of sleep and chilling with the family these next few days.

On a side note… My healthy Thanksgiving was a success! I got most of the family out to the turkey trot. We hooked up the Wii fit and had a blast (especially laughing at my piss poor balance). And dinner was FABULOUS! I can’t believe I pulled it off!

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

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(Thank you for reading, as I remind myself of the things I need to know.)

I’ve been having trouble sorting through my emotions the last couple of days, which as an emotional eater, is a tough spot to be in.  Sometimes I will catch myself thinking “a little bit of sweetness will make all the problems disappear.”  I KNOW it won’t, but the thinking is so deeply ingrained that I still want to turn to food for comfort when I don’t know what else to do.

But eating won’t make me feel better.  It won’t make me feel more appreciated.  It won’t make the anxiety about the future go away.  It won’t erase the sadness that comes from losing new friends so soon after you make them. It won’t make me feel like a better person or a happier one.  It won’t clear away confusion and doubt and fear.

Food won’t help.

Food isn’t a bandaid for emotional problems or stress.  It’s not a solution to problems.  It isn’t a solution for anything, really.  It’s just something that keeps our bodies alive.  We can enjoy it, take pleasure in it, appreciate it, but in the end it is nothing more than fuel for our bodies.

It’s easier to know that food isn’t the right solution than to put that thought into practice.  It’s much easier to give up and let food comfort me for a little while when I feel like a failure.  It’s much easier to forget my long term goals for a few moments of happiness with some food.  But in the long run?

Food won’t help.

I just have to let myself feel what I’m feeling.  It sucks sometimes, and I hate it, but it’s just how it goes.  It’s better to cry or fight or think nothing than to turn to food.  Because that coping mechanism just creates more problems.

Never has stuffing my face to escape or forget my cares ever resulted in something good.  Never. Not once.  Yet for some reason my mind thinks that something that has never shown positive results is the answer.  Funny how our brains can get stuck in a destructive pattern or habit.  It’s hard to let go of things you do for years, even if those things hurt you.

I just have to suck it up and realize everyone feels under appreciated sometimes.  Everyone feels forgotten or lonely.  Everyone has days where they wake up and have no idea what they are doing or worse WHY they are doing it.  Everyone has these emotions at some point.

It’s not fun, but you know what?

Food won’t help.

((So I’m taking these thoughts with me to ruminate over the weekend.  Monday is my final assessment here at Green Mountain, so I’ll post my results then.   Have a good weekend!))

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Shaking my head and rolling my eyes.

I DID NOT want to post this at all but in the spirit of honesty, I had to. I could’ve gotten away with not posting my binge after work because fortunately, I got away with it on the scale this morning. God knows how. Perhaps it was all the fiber and protein.

On a positive note … I slept like a log and woke up with a lot of energy.

Last night I had: 3 boiled eggs, a ton of light mayo, 3 high fiber tortillas plus …

gobs of natural peanut butter, 1 banana and 2 high fiber wraps plus …

2 huge bowls of Shredded Wheat & Bran (probably 5 cups total), almond milk and brown sugar.

In one sitting.

At midnight.

I just kept loading up the food and gobbling it down. I never feel nauseous doing this either. It’s amazing how much food I can pack away.

I just spent the past week feeling sorry for myself at having to work hard to reverse the effects of the last binge and there I was repeating the behavior. Falling down. Getting up.

I find myself feeling nervous about reaching my goal and I don’t know why.

My friends invited me out for dinner and a bonfire at the lake tonight. I’m going after I get a peek at the few hundred people dressed as Santa do a 4k run/walk for the Essex Region Conservation Authority in Amherstburg.

The Grindstone ~~ 60 min. @ 3.3 mph

again ~~ 60 min. @ 3.4 mph

3rd time’s a charm. Came home from my friends’ place and had some energy to burn … at 12:30 am! ~~ 60

min. @ 3.4 mph

The Food: I’m still full from last night so it’s a light eating day for me.

1st meal ~~ 2 cups almond milk + 1 scoop protein powder + spinach + blueberries + a few cranberries leftover in the bag

2nd meal ~~ pork chop + cauliflower + butternut squash + 1 pat butter + pear

3rd meal ~~ I know there’ll be shrimp involved but I don’t know what else yet.

ETA: I sampled everything but didn’t go overboard. Had a great time.

lots of water

coffees with almond milk & splenda

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That’s better.

(I screwed up the number … used L instead of V. oops)

I had to make a compromise today. My mind wanted to take a day off and my knees didn’t want to do a faster pace so I decided I would do the treadmill today at a slower pace for a longer duration. It worked. My knees weren’t so bothered, my mind was happy and I got it done.

I’m not an athletic person. I’m uncomfortable with being uncomfortable so I have to work around my lazy butt attitude.

It doesn’t have to look like you think it *should* look. Whatever gets the job done. Do that.

‘millin on The Grindstone ~~ 91 min. @ 3.3 mph ~~ 5 miles

I have lots of time so doing this isn’t a sacrifice for me.

The Food:

1st meal ~~ 2 cups almond milk + 1 scoop protein powder + 1 banana + spinach + blueberries

2nd meal ~~ 6 jumbo shrimp + 9 small scallops + 1 tsp olive oil + broccoli + 1 pat butter + coffee with almond milk

3rd meal ~~ 1.5 turkey burger + green & yellow beans + butternut squash + 1 pat butter

To prepare my lunches for work, I put frozen veggies in the container. Easy peasy and time saving. They act like their own freezer packs.

Snacks ~~ 2 hard boiled eggs + apple + pear + walnuts

lots of water

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Every year I vow to not stuff myself at Thanksgiving. Because really, being stuffed makes Thanksgiving pretty darn miserable—all you want to do is park it on the couch and watch a football game that you barely have an interest in (or is that just …

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Whether you’re spending Black Friday hitting the sales, shopping online or just relaxing with the fam, be sure to take a few minutes out of the day for yourself and check out these must-read links!

An awesome slideshow of eight trendy health foods and if they’re …

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Gone are the days when you had to spend at least an hour weight lifting and another 30 to 45 minutes for cardio. With your kids alone, it’s just hard to find time to even visit the gym, let alone do your exercises for more than an hour!

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If you have been dreaming of losing weight using the most effective way, you must have heard of Turbulence Training, the world famous weight loss and muscle building program developed by Craig Ballantyne. Unlike other weight loss programs, Turbulence Training does not require you to focus on cardio training to eliminate fats.

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Find out how proper nutrition and exercise can boost your health and help prevent health problems.

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Eat a good breakfast. By matching calorie consumption with your most active hours, you will burn calories more efficiently. Fuel up early in the day with a low-fat meal (cereal with skim milk and fruit, for example).

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